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Saturday, March 11, 2006


Slobodan Milosevic Dies of Natural Causes at 64...

...can 67 year old geriatric Michael Castle be far behind?

Okay. I'm not saying the old guy has one foot in the grave, but - 67 is old and although he is working to cover this fact up, Castle will be 67 next November. A great many people have died of natural causes at (and before) the age of 67. Here are just a few.

Notorious Nazi Dr. Josef Mengele died, at age 67, of natural causes.

Former minor-league hockey player Blake Ball died of natural causes at age 67.

One of Iqaluit's most-loved Inuit leaders, Ben Ell, died at the age of 67, of natural causes.

Minor-league mobster Pasquale (Fat Patty) Catalano pleaded guilty to loan sharking and was sentenced to a year in prison. A week after his arrest, Catalano died of natural causes at age 67. (To be fair, Catalano led an extremely un-healthy life style.)

Her Imperial Highness the Princess Soraya of Iran, died of natural causes at age 67 and is buried in Munich, Germany.

Egyptologist and mummy curse scoffer, Howard Carter (who had the most to do with disturbing The Pharaoh's eternal rest) died in 1939, aged 66 of natural causes.

So where is Castle on the age question? We already know that his voting record shows a disturbing lack of coherence, the kind of incoherence one might associate with the onset of age related mental dementia.

To dig deeper I went to the "biography" page of his official web site, where Castle ducks the age issue by NOT mentioning his birthdate!

What is he hiding with this kind of obtusification: Mike Castle was born and raised in Wilmington, Delaware where he currently lives with his wife Jane. He is a graduate of Tower Hill School, Hamilton College and Georgetown University Law School. What kind of official bio contains no dates whatsoever? The subtext of the whole thing is "trust me, I'm not that old."

Not only does he duck the birthdate issue, but no where on his web site does he come out and say - I AM NOT MENTALLY INCOMPETENT. I think all 67 year olds should have to wear a medic alert bracelet that says that. (Provided that ARE mentally competent.)

Why would someone hide his birthdate and fail to deny that he is "not out of it" if he was not entering his dotage?

Here is the bottom line: Castle needs to come clean on the age issue.

UPDATE: I did some more internet sleuthing and was able to determine that Castle was born July, 2nd 1939. Mike - The truth is out there.

Hey, Jason. Turn around. See that thing on the ground. It's the line. You just crossed it.

Here's a little free advice: The number one subsection of society in voter turnout, especially in a midterm election -- seniors. I'm sure Dennis Spivack would be delighted to tell the seventy-plus crowd that he thinks 67 is too old.
Yeah, jason, that was just weird. Are you off your meds or what? Can you delete this thing?
WTF is right. WTF??

You're the one who should be wearing a med. bracelet, Scourge. It should say "Take Lithium -- NOW."
Jason, I'm a liberal and damn proud of it. This line of ...I can't say reasoning... talk is not helping. Don't do this sort of thing. Please. You are not doing our cause any good.

If you want to see Mike Castle defeated, help someone run a positive, issues-oriented campagn. Lay off his age. Can the "Fake Moderate" stuff.

It's not helping.
In 1972 Joe Biden upset J. Caleb Boggs (born in 1909, which would make him... 61?). I was a kid then, so I don't know first-hand, but the CW is Biden attacked Boggs for his age, and Biden gets credit/blame for a successful negative campaign.

Apparently though, in Biden's defense, Boggs tried to retire and pull out of the election, but Nixon personally convinced him to run one more time, so it looked like Boggs's heart wasn't in it.
In other news, Joe Biden's bio contains this obfuscation:

Joseph R. Biden, Jr. was first elected to the United States Senate in 1972 at the age of twenty-nine

whereupon GWB promptly complained "See? Biden is using fancy mathematical language to conceal his true age from Americans..."
Sheez -

Did anyone laugh? Nobody understands parody anyomore? Sartire? I was doing a Mattt Drudge, but nobody got it.

I guess this: Not only does he duck the birthdate issue, but no where on his web site does he come out and say - I AM NOT MENTALLY INCOMPETENT.

...was too subtle. Lesson learned.

Satire needs to be shorter and subtle. This was too long and too crude. By the time anyone got to the joke, they were already annoyed with you. And, I hate to say it, this was in keeping with a lot of other mean-seeming attackes in your writing.

Oh yes...Sartire? Existential ridicule? Ironic Philosphical questioning?
Get the message, Scourge? When you start miffing nice, well-mannered individuals like Mr. Mahaffie (and I mean that sincerely, BTW, Mike!), doesn't that tell you something?? Anything??

Anyone home?
Mike -

I see your point. I started by saying, "How would Matt Drudge use the Slobodan Milosevic story?" and the thing wrote itself. It is in the the "John Kerry never said that he did not shoot himself - what is he hidding?" style, and I think I nailed it.

I cracked myself up - but I could see why everyone would not find it funny.

For the record, (Hube) I don't think people over 67 should wear medic alert bracelets that say, " I am not incompetnet."

I also think Castle is beatable on his voting record.
I just read it again to check myself - and it cracked me up again.

I mean c'mon Hube. You did not laugh when you read:

To dig deeper I went to the "biography" page of his official web site, where Castle ducks the age issue by NOT mentioning his birthdate!

Maybe you are so used to reading "real" stories like this about Democrats that it seemed legit to you?

Offend away! I thought your Mike Castle joke was funny. Screw subtlety Apparently, others didn't think so.

While we're at it, when is that liberal asshat Bobby Byrd gonna die? His shriveled-up, pruny, false-teeth havin' self has got to be due for a date with Death soon enough. Isn't he like 20 years older than Castle?

You see? I can make fun of liberals dying as well as conservatives. Especially liberal racists like Byrd.
Mike M. -

We seem to be last two people left who have a sense of humor.
The difference is, Mike knows how to get it across -- which makes his a genuine sense of humor.
I dunno, Ash Wednesday post seemed to ruffle a couple feathers! ;-) But, that was religion...a strict no-no for millions of devout Followers of any sect.
Hube -

if this was about 'battlestar gallactica' I'd accept you as the authority. Since it is about humor.... let's just say I'm less willing.
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